A children's treasury of tweets, from a day of Procrastination!

like you surely guessed from the title. i procrastinated severely this afternoon. but i did so on twitter, with poems!

all are real. as real as it gets.

mcsweeneys submission? maybe. just maybe.


progress is relative/ progress is absolute/ all i know/ is im working like poop.


with one project left/he fell quite adrift/ and became quite amazed/ at what he couldnt quite lift.


withdeadlineapproaching/he started emoting/thehorrorthehorror he said/well actually that was kurtz/anditreallyhurts/tosit here in this chair


there is a connection/to my african passion/and it started with conrad/the duality of humans/is really amusing/is kinda what he said!

dante wrote about quite an inferno/that might have made an excellent oratorio/maybe its been done/ireally dont know/for i am so miserabolio


abraham lincoln thomas jefferson/ both were drinking/then started wrestling

george bush george bush/ where are you now?/who knows who knows/youre probably doin a cow.

Liechtenstein and Wittgenstein/somanysyllables/Wittgenstein and Liechtenstein/bothsosmall/Liechtenstein and Wittgenstein/nothing here to see

the news about bob dylan/that is really not so new/is that sometime around 1972/he stopped being a jew

edward abbey came to me/and this is what he said/well it was a dream/ because he is quite dead/'you and thoreau should come with me/ and well go and start some shit'/then he proceeded to pop a tab/of his favored schlitz

-edward abbey had schlitz poured over his grave. He the man.